


Everything I Didn't Say

by diezminutos



Category: Elite (TV)
Genre: Mentions of Cancer, Rebe POV, mostly Ander POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:55:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23504209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diezminutos/pseuds/diezminutos
Summary: The 3 times Ander told the truth
Relationships: Ander Muñoz & Rebe, Ander Muñoz/Omar Shana
Comments: 5
Kudos: 70





	Everything I Didn't Say

1.

Rebe had never seen Ander so upset. Granted, she had never seen Ander express any type of emotion apart from his stoic self in class and his model-like demeanor in the photos Omar had showed her. This was a whole new ballgame.

“Ander?” She placed her hand on his shoulder. He wouldn’t look at her. “ _Ven_.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him into an empty classroom and locked the door.

Ander leaned against the wall. “ _Lo siento_ ,” he gasped through his tears.

Rebe shook her head and placed her bag on the nearby desk. Her mind was running a mile a minute. What could possibly make the calmest person she had ever met break down in this way. “You don’t have to tell me,” she finally spoke again for the first time in what felt like hours. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

What was she supposed to say?

“Can’t have someone as gorgeous as you crying, can we?”

Probably not that.

Ander chuckled as he wiped a tear away.

Okay, so maybe that.

“Is Omar okay?” Rebe finally realized a possible cause for this unpredictable event.

“Yeah. He’s great,” Ander sighed. He slid down so he could sit on the floor while still leaning against the wall.

Rebe slowly took a seat next to him, careful not to move too quickly or startle him in any way. She placed a hand on his knee, hoping to provide him some comfort.

“I went to the doctor,” Ander further crushed the crumbled piece of paper in his fist. “I…I have leukemia.” He put his head in his hands, the tears rushing back like a waterfall.

“ _Joder,_ ” she let out a breath. “Ander. I’m so sorry.” She wrapped her arm around his shoulders. His body shook as he let out another sob.

“Don’t mention it to my mom,” he whimpered trying to stop the tears.

“Yeah okay,” she rubbed his shoulder. “Ander,” she suddenly realized. “You’ve told her, right?”

Ander silently stared at his shoes.

“Ander, you have to tell her. “She’s-“

“Don’t,” he said softly, suddenly much calmer. It was like he flipped a switch. He turned his emotions off just as quickly as he turned them on. If you had blinked, you would have missed it. Everyone else in the hall certainly did. His voice was now low and almost steady. “I don’t need anyone else. I can handle this on my own.” He stood up quickly and stepped away from her. “I don’t know what came over me. I’m sorry.” He grabbed his bag and looked down at her. “Please don’t tell anyone.”

“Of course,” Rebe nodded. “But Ander-“

He took a small step towards.

“You do need people. The loneliness will kill you.”

Ander rolled his eyes. “No. The cancer will.”

The door slammed with a horrible sound yet somehow the silence that followed it was so much worse. Rebe didn’t know what to think. No, she hadn’t known Ander for a long time and they certainly weren’t that close, but part of her felt close to him, nonetheless. They both had been through so much in the past year, almost like they were fighting separate but similar battles side by side. She couldn’t picture Las Encinas without him. She didn’t want to.

She looked at the now empty spot beside her on the floor. Everything happened so quickly. She wanted to help. She wanted to take everything that hurt him and destroy it until it lost everything that made it scary and powerful. She wanted it gone. She wanted to build Ander back into who he was.

2.

“Your teacher said you missed class,” Azucena said the next day as she rummaged through her purse to find her key to the car. Ander closed his eyes. He couldn’t do this, could he? This can’t actually be his life. How on earth was he going to tell his mother that her only son had leukemia? “Well?” Azucena finally found the key and unlocked the door. “Funny enough Guzmán and Polo were gone too.”

“They both hate me, Mama. How many times do I have to tell you?” He opened the passenger door and got in the car. He quickly buckled his seatbelt and sighed as he leaned his head against the window.

“Then where were you?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Ander, don’t do that. It matters to me.”

“I just skipped, okay? I was stressed and I just couldn’t deal today.”

She took a deep breath and started the car. “What can I do, _Cariño_?”

“Nothing, Mama,” he grumbled. He wanted nothing more than to disappear into nothingness. Then he wouldn’t have to hurt her.

The rest of the ride home was silent. Ander felt a tension like he had never felt with another person before, and he knew his mother could feel it, too. Would he feel this tense for the rest of his life? No one told him how one was supposed to feel when they find out they have cancer, but Ander could sense that it wasn’t this.

When they arrived home, Azucena turned off the car and sat for a moment. “You can tell me anything, you know.”

“I know, Mama,” he nodded.

She pressed a small kiss to the top of his head and grabbed her purse before getting out of the car. When she was halfway to the door, Ander finally found it in him to speak.

“I wasn’t stressed,” he shook his head. He looked down at the small stone between them; he couldn’t bear to look her in the eye. “I mean, I was, but not about school.”

“What are you stressed about?” she placed a hand on his shoulder and led him to sit on the small bench outside the kitchen window.

“Omar and I were…” he trailed off. Fuck. How was he going to do this? “I found a lump and…I missed class because I went to the doctor and…I…I have leukemia, Mama.”

She gasped softly. She always over-prepared for everything and yet, Ander knew that no part of her ever prepared to hear those words come out of his mouth. “Ander,” she spoke softly through her tears. “Oh, _Cariño_.”

He placed an arm around her shoulders as she began to cry harder. Neither spoke for a moment. Azucena turned away. “I’m sorry,” she let out a breath as she began to regain her composure.

“I’m going to make it, right?” he said softly, trying desperately to somehow make the situation better.

“Well, of course you are,” she turned to her son, trying just as desperately to convince him as she was herself.

3.

Tell him.

His mother’s voice echoed in his ears like an endless alarm he could never turn off.

Ander stared at the door, but didn’t dare go in. He couldn’t go through the pain of telling another person. Saying those dreadful words once was enough to destroy him. Twice was somehow worse and turned his insides even more. He couldn’t bear to say it again-and to tell Omar of all people would probably be the hardest thing he’ll do in his life.

Part of him wished he had stayed strong and didn’t tell Rebe. Maybe he could have handled everything on his own. He was exhausted by it all already. Too many pitying looks. Too many halfhearted, uncertain you’ll make its. Too many people knowing. He just wanted to let it all go.

But he couldn’t keep a secret from Omar again; it just about killed him the last time. It ate away at him, destroying his soul and parts of Omar’s in the process.

Ander finally found it in himself to stand up. His thoughts battling themselves the entire time it took him to place his hand on the doorknob, turn it, and open the door. As soon as his foot hit the hardwood floor of the living room, Omar’s head perked up.

“Is everything okay?” Panic was evident in his voice. He didn’t even know, and he was worried. Ander thought he was scared to tell his mother, but telling his boyfriend was a different kind of terror. He wished Omar could just know without Ander having to tell him.

Then it hit him, Ander couldn’t go through seeing Omar’s fearful face every day. He didn’t want Omar to waste his life worrying. Omar has to know Ander decided. He can know, but he can’t stay. It’s for his own good.

“What’s wrong? Is your mom okay?”

“Yeah, but,” Ander paused, “I’m not.”

“What do you mean?”

Time to rip off the band-aid Ander thought as the dreadful words spilled off his lips again. “I have leukemia.”

Omar felt his whole world shift. After Ander confessed that he knew what Polo did, Omar only wanted to protect Ander. Omar wanted a shield to ward off all his evils. This was one Omar couldn’t stop.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Please come talk to me on tumblr! (@diez-minutos)


End file.
